we live once in a lifetime.
Since the time we were born.
our fate wasn't written, that's what i believe.
if our fate was written, i'd rather not live on since someone has already plan everything I'll stay at home to sleep and do nothing.
okay lar.. whatever it is.. anyway..

everyone has the choice of...
whether you wanna live the way you want?
e.g. do you want a happy life?
so how to make urself happy?

do you always follow ur tight schedule?
and in the end feel damn stressed up?

OR do you wan a carefree life, whereby you live for urself and do whatever u feel like.

For me, I find that if we always follow what we plan, that's boring but of course there's order in ur life. But to me, this order is nothing more than routine. Thus, for me I'd rather not have a schedule. I'd rather follow my feelings and do whatever I feel like doing. just for work, a job, bo bian.. that one is give le then must go and earn money

I decide le.. from next week onwards, my schedule will be given as below:
Tuesday 6-1030pm
Friday 6-1030pm
Saturday 12-1030pm
Sunday 12 - 5pm

total up each week will have 4.5 +4.5 + 8.5+5 = 22.5hr per week
my pay is 5.5/hr,
which makes up S$123.75 per week.
a month of s$495.

after cpf = s$495 * (20%*20%) = s$475.20
this is dec '07, jan '08 to dec '08

which is = to 13months
13mth * 475.2 = 6177.60 at the end of next year.

I need to save this up because I know during the time of NS... I won't have much income. :)
I'm aiming for 10k so it means if I'm able to.. I'll try to work more from temporary job for more income :) Of course while I wish to achieve this, I will not forget my Dardar..

Darling I'll accompany her like on special occasions or weekdays bah.. It all depends, because for all I know she's not very keen in going out. Maybe cause both of us don't have much money.
I've listen to a few songs recently that makes me feel very.... sad?

Nah.. I don't know how I actually feel..
Darling.. u know I went back to secondary school on friday night right?
My ex wasn't there :/ while my Ba mei, Qiu Xuan, mention about her for some things lar... And my friend also asked abit about that poly posting thing about her.. Darling... I know once things are scarred, it can never be the same... And I know I love you as much as I love myself.

I love your company, I love everything about you. But one thing I cannot deny is that, she's my first love. Maybe just like some songs that I've listen to recently... I can't really.... forget her... I feel so guilty whenever I think of it.. So sorry that I've kept it so long, and I guess u've felt it before. Doesn't matter.. Dar, my feelings for her is different... some complicated feelings that I myself don't know what's it :) But I'm glad that I love u..

I know, U see this part you won't feel good, but it's better than keeping it from you. Since we are together.. I believe that being 'transparent' may be best for both of us. Because through this we can know each other better.

I was watching TV just now, and there's a part where they say... Maybe it's both of them being too selfish to NOT TAKE time to understand each other, instead they tried to accomodate to each other... and in the end, tried to change the other party. So what happen is that both party will no longer be happy. Just like your sister, Michelle. I see that she's trying to change Jerome just to accomodate to her own lifestyle. Something that even Jerome give way, he 'may not be happy'... I tell you this because I've quite some thoughts here... But temporary cannot recall.. TOO much to say in just one entry... maybe next time give u a letter with all my thoughts bah :) May be better this way :)

I've always this inspiration of writing a book about life... conflicts in life, value of life.. And the meaning of life... ALL ABOUT LIFE.. :) I see many things in my life.. but maybe not enough yet.. :D
to be cont.....